Aug 5, 2022
A little over a year ago, in
episode 157 of The Brainy Business, I was honored to have Dr.
Robert Cialdini join me on the show to talk about the new and
expanded version of his book Influence, which has sold many, many millions of copies
around the world, and it is so impactful even nearly 40 years after
its original publishing date. The new version added 220 (pure
gold!) pages and a whole new seventh principle of persuasion –
unity – which is of course the focus of today’s
The six original principles of
persuasion include reciprocity, liking, authority, scarcity, social
proof, and commitment/consistency. Most of those already have their
own episodes of the podcast, which are linked for you in the show
notes along with my interview with Bob when he was on the show. So,
why unity? As I said, while I’ve dedicated episodes to several of
the initial six principles, including scarcity, social proof,
reciprocity, and precommitment…I haven’t done them all yet…so why
jump to the end with Unity before “completing the set” so to speak?
Listen in to find out why and learn more about the amazing
principle of unity.
- [00:07] Today’s behavioral
economics foundations episode is all about Cialdini's new 7th
principle of persuasion: unity.
- [00:48] In episode 157 of The
Brainy Business, I was honored to have Dr. Robert Cialdini join me
on the show to talk about the new and expanded version of his
book Influence, which has sold multi multi multi million
copies and it is so impactful even nearly 40 years after its
original publishing date.
- [03:36] Unity is an underlying
principle that runs through all the others. If you have unity,
everything else can come easier, so understanding this technique
can be impactful in most any approach. (A great reason to jump here
first! It also has less info on it when you search since it is new,
so I wanted to contribute there, and it has a big feature in my new
book, What Your
Employees Need and Can’t Tell You).
- [04:54] Melina shares an
overview of the first six principles.
given a gift, even something incredibly small, people feel
compelled to give back to the gifter.
- [05:51] People are more likely
to do business with people they
like. We are also
influenced by people in authority
even when they don’t have any
expertise in the area we may be asking about.
- [06:28] Because we are a
herding species, we are very influenced by social
proof. We also are very
influenced by items that are scarce. We find them more valuable,
our FOMO and loss aversion are triggered.
- [07:04] People like to
be consistent and do what they have said they will do.
They also like to do business with people who do what they say they
will do. Showing that you have done this is powerful.
- [08:02] If people aren’t buying
what you have to sell, whether it is an idea or a physical product
or service or anything else, it doesn’t necessarily mean the idea
is wrong or bad. You can often change the way you are presenting
the information and enjoy a different result.
- [08:35] Unity goes beyond
liking or social proof and is in the space of how we are the same.
It’s not just that I like you, but we are (as they say) cut from
the same cloth. When you are part of my tribe, when we are a WE, I
become more compelled toward whatever it is you are asking for or
- [09:36] We all have a lot of
identities that we flow between throughout the day; they don’t have
to be weighty to create that connection.
- [10:54] It is pretty easy for
people to come up with 20 self-defining things pretty quickly off
the top of their head.
- [12:32] The way we identify
with a group can shape the way we see the world around us and the
decisions we make.
- [14:31] A key to unity is
finding what is central, core, or defining to both
- [16:25] When you find something
that you like about someone else, it creates a connection that
makes them, in turn, like you more.
- [18:03] Ask good questions and
know there will be some commonality that will help you to find them
more interesting and engaging, and give you something to talk
about, and that it is possible they will think of you more fondly
- [18:22] Know that when you need
to ask people for things, your own affinity groups or people who
you would say are part of your “I am” group are a great place to
start because they are the most likely to say yes to
- [21:11] Bringing one particular
aspect of your shared identity to the front of their mind at the
right time – making that particular identity you share salient at
the right moment – is key for using unity in your life and work
- [22:17] People are busy and
their brains are even busier. Reminding someone of that important
detail at the right moment can have a massive impact.
- [23:32] We form an idea of who
we are, what we are about, and the brain is really good at
explaining why every action supports the way we see
- [26:30] The main point I want
to make is that our busy brains have a lot going on and when you
are asking or offering something to someone, the way you present
that information matters because the brain will assume that
whatever you bring up is being brought up for some reason and it
has a lot of weight on the decision the person makes in that
- [28:46] Unity is an amazing
concept that can help you relate better to those around you and
have a higher likelihood that things will just flow better and be
easier for you.
- [29:05] Take Melina’s Unity
Challenge. Do the 20 statement challenge Dominic talked about in
the snip from his episode on The Power of Us. Next, pick three people whom you can practice
on finding a new opportunity for unity with. Use your freebie
worksheet in these notes to help!
- [31:23] The second challenge
you could take on would be to look at the short term, and if there
is someone you need to ask for a favor from or to pitch something
- [32:31] Try out one or both of
these challenges and share it with Melina on social
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